"Penguins come from Antartica!"

Hello Internet! You can tell i'm glad to be posting because I personified the web of insanity that is the interwebz. Yes, you may now throw stones. 'Interwebz' is one of the stupidest words ever, and has gone from ironic to stupid due to overuse. By the way, I came up with a new joke today. Want to hear it? Glad you do, here it is:



"I walked into Banana Republic today. If I staged a coup, would they get the joke?"

So yeah, there you go. Think about it, let the cerebralness of it all sink into you like a car into snow. Then be sure to share it. Make it a meme, make it famous. So there you go.

In other news, I got a couple games in on vassal recently. Its tough, because I tend to start playing around midnight. Which is a terribly dumb idea. While free-association brought on by sleep-deprivation got me through college, its not as much fun now that i've got a 1.5-yr old alarm clock. So yeah, i haven't gone to bed before 330 in a couple nights. Ooog, I feel wiped out. Quick strategy rundown: I'm playing Tau. No surprise there, I love the fishheads. Speaking of which, WHAT THE HECK THQ. I picked up Dawn of War years ago, and loved it almost as much as Starcraft. When I wasn't Dragoon rushing, I was Fire-Warrioring. Those guys are awesome, and Crisis suits are a waste of population slots. Then I pick up 40k: surprise! Fire warriors are not in fact awesome. I have 48 of them, all painted, and no more than 6 ever see the table. Thanks THQ. Oh, and I love Crisis suits. The old stealth suits are ok, the new ones are clunky. So I don't mind that every Tau army must include a bunch of Crisis suits and Broadsides. Its great, I love their aesthetics and picked Tau due to them and Fire Warriors. Back in the day, I loved Mechwarrior. I loved me some Maurader IIC, Hated RIfleman with a passion, and if it didn't have PPCs I wasn't driving. So yeah, Broadsides rock. Anyways, I like Fire Warriors. And I hate how Kroot go balls-up as soon as something scary comes their way. balls-up. Yes, that is a thing, and its terrible. Its up there with Dane Cook kind of unpleasant experience. If you like him, you shouldn't, he's not funny. So there. Anyways, I like Fire Warriors, and I hate... we did this. we'll skip foward. I decided to try to fit two squads of them in Devilfish in, for scoring purposes. In an 1850 list, I dropped some hounds and a crisis suit, and something else I don't remember. At 2k, some other stuff. So, on to the games:

Game 1: So this one was against Grey Knights. I deployed/went second. After the loss of a Piranha to his shooting, I pretty much decimated the lower half of his vehicles. Great guy to play against, very amiable. Sadly I won due to forfeit. His keyboard stopped working, and he failed to come back after restarting his computer. However, it was a traditional Tau-vs-GK game. Namely: Tau aren't phased. When you die to tantrums in CC, awesome killy powers are irrelevant. So, you shoot them. And since they cost more, there are less. And that is always good news. Which means, I think Tau will become more prevalent now that GK are the cheese-of-the-week.

Game 2:This game was different, but pretty awesome. My opponent introduced me to the Tyrants Legion, an IA option that allows you to field an IG+SM with some freakin sweet special rules. Are they overpowered? Not really. Is it a cool change? Pretty much. We played a couple rounds, then my opponent had to concede due to the lateness of the night. But, I think I had this one. It was a blast, I'm happy with how my list performed.

Game 3: This game went back and forth. Dawn of War versus Black Templar. Man, that Marshall can soak some firepower. It took me 3 turns to drop him and his honor guard. I've never seen a squad pass so many saves, and we're talking railgun, railgun, plasma, missile, kroot gun, kitchen sink, you name it. At the very end, I lost due to being unable to score a wound on the bottom Initiate squad, and being unable to kill the rhino that blasted through dangerous terrain to contest my objective. First two turns, I def had it. Then... a multi-assault that killed a FW squad, Kroot Squad and Dfish happened. After that it seesawed with turns 5 and 6 resulting in not a single death on his side of the board. But it was fun, glad I got to play.


So there you go. The morale of this story is: don't let terminators get in your lines. They're beastly. But when a Kroot Hound takes one down its hillarious. So yeah. Lovin Tau, Lovin Life. Until next time!


~Shas'el Mike
Say some things... you know you've only got one